What's in a Name?

For some people the name of their future children is very important. It can be the name of a close family member (alive or deceased), a name given by someone that is no longer with us or even a name of a location that has special meaning to you or your SO. There are a gazillion (OK, maybe not that much) reasons as to why someone chose the name they did for their child, even if it is as unique as Apple or Moonbeam.

The reason I bring this up is because more often than not this can become a very sensitive issue - like relationships get destroyed when other people "steal" a name.

My hubby and I struggled with revealing the name of our DD because it is something unique to us and our relationship. Do we reveal it or do we not? At times we were overly anxious about it and it made this whole process quite depressing. We kept saying to ourselves, "Would someone really take our name?"... unfortunately the answer could be yes. This unknown factor was killing us. Because of this we were keeping track of those that were pregnant, especially those due before us. Sad, I know but this is what was happening to us. I am very happy to say that 3 of my beautiful cousins are due before me and they too are having girls (Yay to girl power!!). Now having said that, can you imagine what was going through our minds at that time when we found out? The problem I was having internally was that I didn't know these cousins well enough because we weren't really close so I didn't know whether they would take our name or not, but I didn't want to take a chance. Our chosen name is not a common name so if it is used it isn't because of coincidence. Our decision... We kept our mouth shut.

As time went on we have relaxed quite a bit about this whole naming process. No, we haven't revealed the name yet at all but have agreed on a time we felt was "perfect" to reveal the name. The baby shower. This will be our chance to celebrate the coming of our dear daughter and also give her the name that we have chosen for her. It will be a beautiful moment for us and our guests. What a better way to include them.

Using our baby shower for the revealing also satisfies our fear. My family is huge so I am positive there will be quite a bit of people at the shower. So when we reveal our name, essentially it is our time to put "dibs" on the name and advise them that it is taken. If someone chooses to take the name (family or friend) others will know where it originated from. We felt this to be the better option than adding more stress to the labor and delivery process which is coming on fast.

So my question is... Can you really have "dibs" on a name? Does it make it more acceptable to claim a name if you are expecting?

Do you have name(s) for your future children already picked out whether you are expecting or not? How would you feel if someone you told the name to, used it for their child?  Would you be OK with it if they approached you about it before using the name? Also, what if you never revealed the name and out of coincidence, your family member or friend chose it for their child, can you be upset about it?

My take from this whole experience, is to make sure that if you have a special name picked out for your children, do not share it with anyone, especially if you are not expecting. Be sure to have back-up names and try if you can to not stress about it. It takes all the fun out of it.